Ticking Bombs & False Alarms
Tuesday, June 28, 2011
There are times when I really scare myself for lack of reason. And there are times where lack of reason leaves me scared.Tuesday, June 28, 2011
I'm juggling with the fact that I can't go back to the days where I could exercise, where I could go for a nice run when I felt guilty from eating too much. Gone are the days where I could attend Tae-Kwon-Doe lessons, throw a few kicks, unleash a nice torrent of sweat, then head home feeling satisfied from working out. And nothing feels better than giving a nice leg-punch to a guy who's bigger than you (when you're my height, it's an awesome feeling - I'm just saying).
This heart thing is really getting to me.
Call me image conscious, because then again who isn't? Everyone wants to look good, or at least know that they are looking their best. I honestly miss how I look. Compare photos back then and now, I might be paranoid by saying that I look more confident back then than now. (Okay, but I will self-admittedly say that I still retain the ultimate charm the male species can offer)
It's scary when old clothes don't fit, the style you were so used to just doesn't match anymore, the people you once knew look at you and wonder how come so much has changed when it's only a change in the physical perspective. I'm sure many of you (in fact, I think almost all of you) wouldn't understand what it's like to not be able to sprint for a bus without feeling weak and exhausted. And it's fine, no one should have to live life feeling chained up.
But if you do, then at least make sure you learn to enjoy it. Masochists have learned how, you should to.
Not saying that I'm a masochist in any way (but I do like it when a woman puts me down and calls me a bitch - wait, I may be revealing too much).
At the end of the day, there are some things which you must tell yourself - accept the things which you cannot change. Then you must also come to realise, you must change the things which you cannot accept. I think that sounds about right. Some things, I cannot help. But what's within my control, I make damn sure I make it work out somehow.
Speaking of making damn sure, I'm loving the new TBS album. Don't ask me how I got it.
So that's about it really. I think I might just be on a quest to help myself, well, gain a better outlook on life. Excellent.
And yes, kaboom.
5:07 AM
Change for me
Elliot Lucas Marcell16.01.91
164.5cm
Meridian JC
CHANGE
Since I don't have a band, I was wondering what I was gonna put up here. Okay, when I think of something good then I'll place up. Till then, you can watch this empty space. Which isn't so empty anymore considering I've just typed words inside of this box. Wow.
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